Fear of pain in birth?

“I am afraid of the pain.”

“I am afraid my body won’t be able to do it.”

“I am afraid I will have a bad experience again.”

These are real fears. The unknown that comes with birth can feel overwhelming, but it can also be something we deeply surrender to and learn to trust.

In Genesis 3:16 (NIV), God tells Eve:

“I will greatly increase your pain in childbearing; with painful labor you will give birth to children.”

What may seem like a curse to all women is often misunderstood. The truth is, God only cursed the serpent and the ground. He gave Adam and Eve consequences.

Notice the word increase. This suggests that some level of discomfort likely already existed in labor, but it became more intense after the fall.

Now remember Genesis 1:28 (NIV), where God says:

“Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.”

This was not a suggestion, it was a command. And if God gives a command, would He not also design the process and hold authority over the outcome?

A woman’s body was made to bring forth life. The pain she experiences is not greater than her, it is coming from her. With every contraction, the uterus works with powerful contractions, intentionally pressing the baby down. That pressure, that sensation we call “pain,” is also a guide. Letting her know when to push, when to work with her body and baby to bring him or her earthside.

Being able to feel what the body is doing and the baby working together is a gift not something to run from.

Throughout scripture, we see a pattern of the enemy going after children and future generations. I would argue, what better way to do that than by targeting the woman? The one created to bring forth life.

What better way to gain power over her than to whisper lies that she is incapable?

Maybe it’s a friend’s traumatic birth story.

Maybe it’s a diagnosis that labels you “high risk.”

Maybe it’s your own past experience that left you questioning your body.

If the enemy can strip a mother of her sovereignty in birth, if fear and doubt grow strong enough, what happens when women stop desiring to have children altogether? 

What kind of threat are we, our children, to him anymore?

Birth is a moment unlike any other. It is one of the most physically and spiritually intense experiences a woman may ever have. A moment where she can feel both overwhelming strength and deep peace.  It, in my experience, is to experience the holy spirit all around her. 

And out of that experience comes life.

She goes to the ends of the earth, touches something beyond herself, and brings her baby back with her.

It changes her. Forever.

To experience the pains of labor is not a curse. It can be an initiation into motherhood. A place where confidence is built, instincts are awakened, and faith deepens. Both in God and in who she was created to be.

Even for a woman who is not a believer, something shifts. There is a transformation. A fire lit. A seed planted.

And that is not what the enemy wants.

He wants you afraid, he wants you to put more trust in the system created by imperfect humans, than in your creator. 

But mama, hear this:

There is no pain in birth that is bigger than you, because it is not bigger than God. And God designed you to be an active participant in bringing the life you grew inside you into the world.

Your baby is a blessing from God.

And in order to receive that blessing, there is often a shaping that takes place within us.

When God designed labor, I believe He also designed a process that strengthens a woman’s trust in herself, in her instincts, and in her ability to mother.

And please note, I am not saying that a woman who does not experience birth unmedicated or vaginally will not be an incredible mother. Things do happen that are out of one’s control. 

But it is something to understand that when the experience is dulled or a part of the process is skipped, this may also quiet parts of the physiological unfolding needed to support bonding, nursing, healing, and trust. 

Requiring more grace, more help and more time as she transitions into the new woman she has become.

Do not not fear what will unfold in birth. Labor is not random. It is not meaningless. And it is not a punishment.

It is DESIGNED.

Each wave of pain is meant to be felt, to be embraced. It is a guide for you to remain in a state of surrendering control.

And from that surrender, will come the greatest redemption.

Jesus tells us in John 16:21

"A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world".